Entrepreneurs don’t pick the low lying fruit. They’d rather get a ladder and climb to the top for the sun-ripened best of the bunch. That’s why so many entrepreneurs wind up with broken necks; they keep falling off those tall ladders while reaching for the premium apples or kumquats or whatever. So either they should get better healthcare coverage, or they should start using digital marketing in a better way to keep from having to climb up into all that dreadfully twiggy foliage in the first place. (Full Disclosure here: I am a paid lobbyist for the Anti-Ladder League.)

There are basically two ways a new startup can take advantage of the internet and social media.

First, use social media like Facebook marketing 101 and Twitter to amass a host of bots that will do your bidding. Then take those legions of bots and march on your competitors, destroying them with an inundation of groundless, mindless posts on their own social media sites until they are forced to close down all their internet sites and flee to the south of France, where they can write their memoirs and eat loup de mer until it comes out their ears.

Secondly, go in search of the One True Keyword that will drive every Search Engine to your landing page. The SEO quest may take years and involve countless battles with trolls and black hackers — but in the end, when you are old and dressed in rags, a byword among the affluent and corpulent marketing community, you will have the satisfaction of knowing very little and gaining even less. But that’s life, boychik.